SCALPERS INC. WE GO ABOVE AND BEYOND FOR YOU!

BREAKING NEWS:

SCALPERS INC. WE GO ABOVE AND BEYOND FOR YOU!

Promotional consideration, paid for by the following:

“Scalpers”. “Flippers”. “Resellers”. We have heard them all. Everybody seems to have a very negative opinion of us. This is why SCALPERS INC. will try to fix that!

At SCALPERS INC., we will go ABOVE and BEYOND for you to find those action figures and toys that you really want:

ABOVE the price labelled at retail, and

BEYOND the price any normal person would pay for it.

Trust us, we will make you appreciate what we do for you. It’s not like you have a choice, anyway… The shelves at your local stores will still be empty! We only ask for that “time and energy” tax. (“Time and energy” tax explained in a previous ToyFarce article: https://www.toyfarce.com/news//2020/08/time-and-energy-new-tax-from-unassumed.html )

**ToyFarce does not share the opinions expressed by SCALPERS INC. It looks like there was a glitch in the ad campaign app, and they managed to take advantage of that. Our apologies! Now back to regular programming…

More news at 11:00… do not support the S.C.A.L.P.!

#toyfarce #scalpers #flippers #resellers #scalpersinc #neca #hasbro #mcfarlanetoys #jazwares #gijoe #transformers #aewunrivaled #starwars #spawn #starwarsblackseries #marvellegends #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycommunity #toycollection #humor #satire #parody

JULY 2021, THE WORST MONTH EVER FOR SCALPERS!

BREAKING NEWS:

JULY 2021, THE WORST MONTH EVER FOR SCALPERS!

“We may never recover financially from this!” said an anonymous scalper (sporting a blond mullet and a t-shirt with a tiger on it).

The S.C.A.L.P. industry held an emergency meeting this week after suffering devastating blows the entire month. They had an international conference call to try to figure out what their next move should be.

“I hereby declare July 2021 was “Anti-Scalper month” for the history books. Companies have been decimating our ebay prices!”

“Between NECA releasing their exclusive sets on their own website, Target re-issueing all the G.I.Joe Classified Series figures for everyone to order, and now people are making fun of us by LITTERALY scalping Space Jam 2 Lebron James figures, and selling their heads on ebay… we are a joke, now! I heard a Japanese magazine even fired a guy who tweeted about his support for us!” (See previous article: https://www.toyfarce.com/news/hobby-japan-blues-a-tale-of-consequences ). “This can’t go on! We need to find a way to continue making a living out of buying the things that people want and selling them at a higher price!”

“-How about getting a normal job? (the crowd boos) - No, not that!”

Inspired by a quote from @papa_schmitty

More news at 11:00… Scalpin' ain't easy!

#toyfarce #scalpers #scalp #toycommunity #toyindustry #target #gijoeclassifiedseries #neca #tmnt #turtlesindisguise #spacejam #lebronjames #hobbyjapan #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycollection #humor #satire #parody

TARGET’S SUMMER GEEK-OUT - THE SCALPING INDUSTRY IS IN SHAMBLES!

BREAKING NEWS:

TARGET’S SUMMER GEEK-OUT - THE SCALPING INDUSTRY IS IN SHAMBLES!

Over the last few days, Target held its Summer Geek-Out event, where the would sell various items from their ‘Collector’s Spot’ selection. This is an event aimed at us, the toy collectors, where they had many highly sought-after items back in stock. One specific thing caught the entire toy community’s attention, as they announced that all the G.I.Joe Classified Series Cobra Island figures (you know, the Target exclusive ones…the ones we poke fun at on a regular basis!) would be back up for order.

I like the “Last chance” part, basically saying “It’s on you if you don’t get them!”

Needless to say, thousands of Joe fans rushed to Target’s website/app to try to get their order in (and obviously, it didn’t go without any issue, and people reported getting error messages when adding items to their cart, but it seems that it was ironed out pretty fast and tons of collectors managed to secure their order). On wednesday morning, at 9am EST (6am PST lol), the Cobra Island Roadblock, Beachhead, Firefly, Cobra trooper and the likes found their way back on Target’s website, and on thursday morning at the same time, the Baroness set and the Cobra Viper were available for all to order. So, if you are in the west side of the US, and one of your colleagues looked tired on wednesday and thursday, you now know why!

This chain of event had huge ramifications on the scalping industry, which had used the Target exclusive G.I.Joe Classified series figures as their bread and butter for the past year…

Sure… They killed the line by enabling people to buy them.

An anonymous member of the S.C.A.L.P. commented: “How could they do that to us? You don’t understand! It was going so well, we had a network of Target employees getting us entire boxes of them, so that we could resell them at 4-5 times the retail price. And now, it’s all ruined! People will be able to get those figures at a normal price. When you add that to the fact there were no Comic Con the last 2 years for us to snag the exclusives from and make a mint from them, we may never recover financially from this. We will have to start a GoFundMe page for scalpers…”

And of course, the toy community delivered some great toy memes. Here are a few great ones:

Bill Moore on Facebook

The almighty @chaztheguru on instagram

And of course, as a community, we have to give credit where credit is due, and on behalf of all the people that managed to get their Cobra Island figures, after being patient and not giving in to the scalper prices:

@chaztheguru

Can anyone check on the few people that listed Cobra Island figures a few days ago at scalper prices? Are they ok?

More news at 11:00… Yo Joe June, now in July!

#toyfarce #hasbro #hasbropulse #target #gijoe #gijoeclassified #cobraisland #cobra #targetsummergeekout #summergeekout #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycommunity #toycollection #humor #satire #parody

“THIS IS A BLUDD DONATION!” - MAN BANNED FROM SEVERAL CLINICS AFTER OFFERING G.I.JOE FIGURES

BREAKING NEWS:

“THIS IS A BLUDD DONATION!” - MAN BANNED FROM SEVERAL CLINICS AFTER OFFERING G.I.JOE FIGURES

Last weekend, in Florida (I mean, where else?), a man in his early thirties was banned from several clinics after pretending that he was there to donate blood. Once he arrived, he filled all the required papers, and once he was sent to the nurses to donate his blood, the man took a G.I.Joe action figure from his backpack and offered it to the staff.

“We were really confused about what he meant by that, but then we saw the name of the action figure…”, said one of the nurses.

The figure was a G.I.Joe: Classified Series Major *BLUDD*. It turns out that this young man had misunderstood a message on TV, and thought that he was supposed to do a “BLUDD donation”, by giving away a Major Bludd figure.

We will keep you informed as this is an ongoing event, and we are still getting updates.

More news at 11:00… “I am a BLUDD donor!”

PS: Wanna do something fun? Take a picture of a Major BLUDD figure next to a hospital and use the hashtag #BluddDonation ! (I’m very curious if this will get even one reply!)

#toyfarce #gijoe #hasbro #hasbropulse #gijoeclassifiedseries #majorbludd #target #targetexclusive #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycollection #toycommunity #humor #satire #parody

WHO BROKE THE INTERNET? G.I.JOE AND STAR WARS COLLECTORS BOTH CLAIM TO HAVE CRASHED WEBSITES AT 1 PM!

BREAKING NEWS:

WHO BROKE THE INTERNET? G.I.JOE AND STAR WARS COLLECTORS BOTH CLAIM TO HAVE CRASHED WEBSITES AT 1 PM!

Yesterday (June 10th, 2021), at 1pm EST, many toy websites were in turmoil, as several pre-orders hit all at the same time, causing some crashes. But let’s rewind a little...

A week ago, during the Hasbro Pulse: Fan First Friday Yo Joe! livestream, the Hasbro G.I.Joe team announced a new G.I.Joe Classified Series set, including Snake Eyes and Timber, that would be available for pre-order on June 10th, at 1pm EST.

Then, this week, during the Hasbro Pulse: I am your father’s day Star Wars livestream, the Hasbro Star Wars team announced a plethora of figures (a new Rogue One Black Series wave, Black Series archives figures, and a new wave of The Vintage Collection), and all those figures would all become available for pre-order…you guessed it right…on June 10th, at 1pm EST.

So, of course, the inevitable happened. Tons of G.I.Joe and Star Wars collectors rushed to the big toy websites, which caused some of them to crash and become unavailable for some time. Some met crashes on Hasbro Pulse’s website. Others on Entertainment Earth or Big Bad Toy Store.

Here’s what we saw at 1pm EST…

ToyFarce has now witnessed people in Star Wars collectors Facebook groups that claim, with pride, that it is thanks to them that all the websites crashed. Others, in G.I.Joe groups, say that it is thanks to the G.I.Joe fans that the websites couldn’t handle the traffic. ToyFarce interviewed a random person from each side:

G.I.Joe collector: “Of course, it’s the Joe fans that crashed all! And on ‘Yo Joe! June’, no less! It’s our month! Have you seen that Snake Eyes and Timber set? It’s amazing! I’m sure all the G.I.Joe collectors worldwide logged in at the same time at 1pm EST sharp to get that one! We all know that, and you know what they say about knowing… YO JOE!”

Star Wars collector: “It’s obvious to me that it is the Star Wars collectors that crashed Hasbro Pulse, Big Bad Toy Store and the others. There were more figures coming out for us, so we have the strength in numbers! Like Han Solo, we shot first! The Star Wars collectors take that win!”

The S.C.A.L.P association refused to comment on which side they were on, but it is fair to assume that their bots probably had something to do with the crashes as well.

Either way, whether it is the G.I.Joe or the Star Wars collectors that crashed all the websites in order to get their new figures, the clear winner in this story is Hasbro! Next time, have a few Marvel Legends figures available for pre-orders at the same time too!

#toyfarce #hasbro #hasbropulse #gijoe #gijoeclassifiedseries #starwars #starwarstheblackseries #starwarsthevintagecollection #rogueone #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycollection #toycommunity #humor #satire #parody

AFTER TRADING CARDS, TARGET TO STOP SELLING FOOD ALTOGETHER, UNTIL PEOPLE LEARN TO BEHAVE!

BREAKING NEWS:

AFTER TRADING CARDS, TARGET TO STOP SELLING FOOD ALTOGETHER, UNTIL PEOPLE LEARN TO BEHAVE!

Earlier this week, we have learned that Target will stop selling trading cards (Pokémon, NBA, NFL, MLB) nationwide, starting from today (May 14th, 2021). The whole trading card collecting has been booming lately, with cards going up in value exponentially. Collectors, along with non-collectors who want to make a quick buck (aka scalpers) have been going to the stores at opening hour and litteraly fighting over trading card packs. Here are a couple of pics that have been seen in various stores:

The decision came after several incidents were reported over the last few months, as adult people were actually fighting over trading cards (See also: GI Joe Classified Series Cobra Island figures / Major Bludd / NECA Turtles in Disguise 4-pack, etc…). An incident in Wisconsin went a bit too far, guns were involved, and the Target employees were tired of having people ask about them all the time (once again, see also: GI Joe Classified Series Cobra Island figures / Major Bludd / NECA Turtles in Disguise 4-pack, etc…).

“I’m definitely gonna get some Pokémon cards today! I feel lucky!”

Somehow, they didn’t bat an eye when the entire country was fighting over toilet paper, but that’s none of our business… (insert Kermit sipping tea meme). There were videos on the internet of litteral fights over toilet paper for months, but that did not make them stop selling toilet paper…

“Hey! It’s limited to 1 per family!”

ToyFarce heard that after reading the comments online about that decision, Target is planning to stop selling anything in the store, whether it is food, clothes, toys, etc… until people learn to behave appropriately.

A representant of Target sent the following statement:

“They’re just cards, for f***’s sake! That’s it, we’re shutting it all down. You all can go to your room and think about what you did!”

The following picture is (obviously) a meme, but we really wish it were true:

Have you ever witnessed some of those fights over trading cards (or toys)? Or did you have a successful hunt and found your Cobra Island or NECA TMNT figures? Let us know in the comments!

More news at 11:00… See also: GI Joe Classified Series Cobra Island figures / Major Bludd / NECA Turtles in Disguise 4-pack, etc…

#toyfarce #target #tradingcards #ban #pokemoncards #mlbcards #nflcards #nbacards #pikachu #hasbro #gijoeclassifiedseries #neca #tmnt #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycommunity #toycollection #humor #satire #parody

TARGET SOON TO HAVE “MAJOR BLUDD” ON THEIR HANDS!

BREAKING NEWS:

TARGET SOON TO HAVE “MAJOR BLUDD” ON THEIR HANDS!

A few days ago, a wild Major Bludd figure appeared, out of nowhere, on eBay (it was super effective!)…

The figure appeared, with pictures courtesy of Galactic Trade Ship (check out their facebook page!). Here are some of the pictures from the ebay listing, along with the description.

That sounds a bit suspicious, no?

So, in a totally predictable (and hilarious) way, this is what happened next: People started to troll the seller, and placed tons of bids on the item. It started at $0,01…

…then it got crazier…

…and crazier…

…AND CRAZIER…

… UNTIL CRAZINESS OVERLOAD!

The listing has since been removed, due to the insanity. Some people started suspecting that it could be a fake, or a nicely done custom… until Robo from The Fwoosh, a pretty reliable source on all things toys, along with Luke_figuremeout, a lesser known toy review page, started posting *IN HAND* reviews. Robo says that the figure came from their P.O. Box, more or less anonymously, and Luke_figuremeout says that any comment asking where it came from will be ignored… THE PLOT THICKENS. Here are the 2 videos…

So, obviously, people started speculating even more!

So far, there are only 3 or 4 in existence (or only 2, if the 2 ones seen in the ebay listing pics are the same one that ended in Robo and Luke’s hands). So what is it? A very elaborate prank? A very good customizer that managed to fool the entire toy community? A leak that blew out of proportion after the ebay listing? Either way, “Major Bludd” is everything that G.I.Joe collectors worldwide want right now…

And of course, it’s a Target Exclusive (Target being an affiliate of COBRA, see old article : https://www.toyfarce.com/news/target-revealed-as-part-of-cobra ). So, to reiterate that glorious pun from the title: Target will soon have “Major Bludd” on their hands, if the figure actually comes out. People will fight for it. The first listing on eBay nearly went for $25,000 (jokingly), so you can be sure that scalpers will try very hard.

What do you make of it? Let us know in the comments!

More news at 11:00… AND KNOWING IS HALF THE BATTLE

#toyfarce #hasbro #hasbropulse #gijoe #gijoeclassifiedseries #majorblood #target #cobra #gijoecobra #gijoecollector #gijoenation #gijoecommunity #gijoetoys #cobraisland #targetexclusive #ebay #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycommunity #toycollection #humor #parody #satire

REVIEW: SPREAD THE LOVE WITH PIMP DESTRO (aka PROFIT DIRECTOR DESTRO)

TOYFARCE REVIEWS:

SPREAD THE LOVE WITH PIMP DESTRO (aka PROFIT DIRECTOR DESTRO)!

It’s Wednesday. You know what that means… ToyFarce review!

Suggested music to listen to while checking this review: “Careless Whisper” by George Michael, any Barry White song, Val Venis WWF theme…

It’s Valentine’s Day week, so we had to review a figure that screams “Love”, and who better than Hasbro’s G.I.Joe Classified Series Profit Director Destro (or P.D.D. or Pimp Destro for short)! This figure is loud, colorful, and amazing!

The art on the box is just perfect for that figure, even if inconsistent with other G.I.Joe Classified Series figures, with touches of bright pink and gold (or, you know…yellow).

Front and side

The figure itself is just a retooling/repaint of the regular G.I.Joe Classified Series Destro, but this is a rare case of when the repaint is 1000% better than the original one. I do not have the G.I.Joe Classified Series Destro, but I needed this one. LOOK AT IT!

“Hey yo’!”

“See anything you like?”

When it comes to accessories, that is where that figure really shines at. Obnoxious pink glasses? Check. A burning wad of cash? Check. An outrageous leopard skin cape? Check. Golden gun? Check. He also comes with the same suitcase with a computer and tons of cash in it as the regular Destro, but his is made of gold.

“Oh, you want to see my accessories?”

“Check out the cape.”

BEST. POSE. EVER.

He can also take care of people who would make fun of his outfit.

The figure has, as expected, a decent range of articulations, allowing many poses. Double elbows, double knees, butterfly joints, ab crunch, the whole nine yards, if you are familiar with modern Hasbro products.

“Nothing better than a nice stretch after a day of successful criminal activities”

“Thinking of you…”

“Do you like my V-neck? Would you like to see more?”

Pimp Destro can also be very playful, and will always be there for people who are searching for love, and who have money for it…

“I heart you!”

“Peek-a-boo! I see you”

“Pimpin’ ain’t easy…”

“How you doin’?”

Too bad I don’t have a WWE Godfather figure to go along with it, that would have made a nice photoshoot! How about you? Were you seduced by Pimp Destro? Let us know in the comments!

More news at 11:00… Pimpin’ ain’t easy!

#toyfarce #hasbro #hasbropulse #gijoe #gijoeclassifiedseries #destro #profitdirectordestro #pimpdestro #pimpinainteasy #actionfigures #toys #collectibles #toycollector #toycommunity #toycollection #toyphotography #toyreview #humor #parody